Lie #4

IF YOU AREN'T SEXUALLY ACTIVE, YOU MUST BE REPRESSED, SICK OR A PRUDE. This can be a very intimidating lie. But the fact is that premature sex is bad for your emotional, physical and cultural health. Researchers at Indiana University, as reported in the February 1991 issue of Pediatrics, found that sexually active teenagers are more prone to alcohol abuse and illegal drugs. They also have more trouble in school. The researchers found that sexually active girls were more likely to be depressed, have low self-esteem, feel lonely or attempt suicide.

Sexually transmitted diseases have received abundant attention from the press in recent years. The news is full of stories of tragic deaths from AIDS. Equal time has not been given to the advice of many medical experts that extramarital abstinence is the best way to avoid these diseases.

In addition, premarital sex may be bad for the emotional health of your future marriage. It lays the groundwork for comparisons, suspicions and mistrust. "Am I as attractive [or as sexually stimulating] as his last partner?" "She didn't wait for me before we were married; I wonder if she will be faithful to me now."

Sexual promiscuity is even bad for our civilization. One study of more than eighty societies, ranging from ancient to primitive to more modern, revealed "an unvarying correlation between the degree of sexual restraints and the rate of social progress. Cultures that were more sexually permissive displayed less cultural energy, creativity, intellectual development and individualism, and a slower general cultural ascent" (Reo Christenson, Christianity Today, February 19, 1982, p. 16). Why do we, as individuals and as a society, trade our energy, creativity, and intellectual development for momentary sexual pleasure? Because we have believed the lie that delayed gratification is repressive and prudish. We would rather be deceived than be perceived as a prude!